Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Anarchy

Hell hath no fury like three baked girls in Panera when the manager gives away the bakery.

It snowed today. A lot. The University cancelled all classes for the first time in nearly thirty years. Of course, I didn’t find out until I actually went to class. All dressed up with no where to go, I headed out in search of coffee and nice place to study. Some stuff happened in between (three clues: snow, rear-wheel drive, unplowed parking lots), but eventually I made my way to Panera. Six or eight other brave souls (all of whom drove Jeeps!) had the same idea, including aforementioned “artists,” but the restaurant was otherwise empty.

Not long after I arrived, the manager announced he was closing the restaurant and sending his employees home before the roads worsened. But what’s a bakery to do with a day’s worth of fresh-baked goods and no one to buy them? Give them all away!

Now, I’ve spent alotta time around alotta people high on all whatever kind of bud or hash they preferred (after all, I lived in a frat house for a year), but never have I EVER seen three stoned girls move so fast! They were up at that counter quicker than beer turns to piss. Ludicrous Speed. It was like watching kids in a toy store, but not. Maybe hyperactive kids on crack in a crack store? Anyway, when they finished, each girl had a couple boxes and a bag full of spoils - scones, brownies, pastries, muffins, you name it. They have their work cut out making sure it all gets eaten. Good thing classes are cancelled tomorrow, too.

For my part, I took a cinnamon roll. And then, I took another. Whatever. Maybe I’ll knock up Starbucks tomorrow. And maybe I’ll throw more snowballs at cars passing by my balcony. Or perhaps I’ll just play football in four foot snow drifts. If only there was a good sledding hill around here...

Yeah, I pretty much love snow days.

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

The Final Countdown (do-do DOO doooo...)

Somehow, I'm scheduled to graduate from law school 94 days from today (not that I'm counting). After twenty years of education, precious little stands between me and the end of my youth as I know it? a giant bag of cash? the sale of my soul? being a lawyer. A couple months, a couples exams, a couple papers. Oh, and there's the bar. Almost forgot - it's such a minor inconvenience. By "minor inconvenience," I mean "most ridiculous exam ever created," and also "biggest pain in my ass ever." But like I said, precious little.

Between now and then, I'll be occupied with little things - like what to do with my life - and big things - like how I'm going to fit studying for the bar in between Cubs games. But before that, I have a couple classes left. In case you're interested (I know... you're not), the line-up for this semester:

Constitutional Law II: inter alia, procedural due process, substantive due process, equal protection, other fundamental rights;
Constitutional Law III: first amendment jurisprudence;
Federal Courts: Article III courts and the nature of judicial power (with a little jurisdiction thrown in);
Advanced Law & Economics Colloquium; we review working/unpublished papers on various L&E topics;
Advanced Legal Writing: self explanatory, dry, and practical.

Mixed in with all that, I have work to do as grad assistant and as an associate editor of my journal. So yeah, I'll be busy. But believe it or not, I actually love this stuff. Don't laugh. Or do. Whatever.

Now if you'll excuse me, it's time for laundry and a little non-law school reading. I'm currently paging through The Emperor's Children by Claire Messud, and I *highly* recommend it.

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Meanwhile in Champaign

I've been home a little more than six weeks now, but it feels much longer. I still think about Leuven every day. I miss it. Terribly.


Ladeuzeplein, mid-morning, Autumn.

Alexander Pope told us long ago in An Essay on Criticism that "A little Learning is a dang'rous Thing." Some people think this drives at the same idea behind "blissful ignorance". They might have an argument, too. While it's foolish to envy the ignorant, life might be a bit easier, on occasion, if everything was a bit more simple. If I never spent time abroad, I'd be more content back in America's Heartland. I wouldn't ache for last October, and I wouldn't daydream of morning bike rides through Haverlee.

The 'castle' at Haverlee. Though it's in the wrong country, it recalls my image of Austen's Pemberley.

Of course, anyone who argues the virtues of a sheltered life is an idiot in my book. Besides, Pope wasn't advocating a simple existence at all. Most people don't bother to go back and read what actually follows his famous line, but if they were to remove their heads from their asses, they'd discover something completely different. Pope was merely observing the naivete of youth and the ability of experience to dampen inspiration. He notes "In fearless Youth we tempt the Heights of Arts," while those who've already bought the tee shirt "tremble to survey/The growing Labours of the lengthen'd Way." If anything, Pope was telling us to embrace the irrational exuberance of unjaded youth and do crazy shit before we grow old and tired.

Anyway, do I miss Leuven so much? Yes. Would my current situation be easier to handle had I never gone? Probably. But I guess that's just the price I pay, and I'd pay it a million times over before I gave it all up. Besides, I have like 1,500 pictures to look through when I get bored.

Haverlee.

Monday, February 05, 2007

Happy to be of Service

Like many part-time narcissists who blog (at least in part) for the sake of inflicting themselves on the world, I use Site Meter. By the magic of a bit of software, a massively interconnected web, and the internets, Site Meter provides (for free) a very limited amount of information about computers that access my blog. Basically, I can see how many users visit my page and, on occasion, how they got there. Thus, if you were Google the terms "semantic chicanery" and then click on the website that pops up, Site Meter would tell me you arrived here via a Google search of "semantic chicanery".

Now, I can do more with computers than most people this side of those whose job it is do things with computers, but I don't claim to have a strong grasp of the complex algorithms behind search engines like Google. Nonetheless, if the search engine spits out my website as a result for whatever search, I'm happy. It means I get more readers, and thus, more victims. As a (temporarily) small-time media mogul, I'm not picky about who reads my garbage. And so to the individuals who arrived here via Google searches of "Amsterdam prostitution genital warts" and "beer fest bitches", I thank you for your patronage and hope you find continued prosperity on the road of life, though if your searches are any indication, I'm afraid at least one of you may encounter a few rough patches ahead.